Ditch the Hopium: The Financial Checklist for Surviving the Financial Dumpster Fire

Ditch the Hopium: The Financial Checklist for Surviving the Financial Dumpster Fire So, I’ve been talking to folks about their stock portfolios and banks, and I’ve come to a mind-blowing conclusion: Either their financial advisors have no idea what they’re doing, or they’re actively hiding the truth. Or maybe, just maybe, they’re pulling off an impressive combo of both. It’s like watching a toddler in a suit clutching a Magic 8-Ball, giving you serious investment advice with a straight face—“Should you hold your stocks?” Shake shake… “Ask again later!” It’s laughable. The truth? Who knows. But it’s probably somewhere between the toddler and a poorly executed magic trick-maybe sprinkle a little pixie dust on top for good measure and hope for the best. Meanwhile, Warren Buffett—you know, the guy worth $280 billion—has been dumping stocks like they’re burning a hole in his pocket. He’s cutting his portfolio with the precision of a hot knife through butter, yet your advisor is sitting back, sipping their coffee, telling you to “ride it out.” Sure, why not? Because ignoring the fact that corporate insiders are cashing out left and right always works out great, right?

Oh, and let’s talk about Hopium, shall we? Hopium is that magical drug your financial advisor is pumping into you every time they say, “Don’t worry, the market will come back.” It’s that false sense of security they sell you so you keep your money exactly where they want it—firmly in the stock market, where they get to collect their fees whether you win or lose. It’s like watching a poker game where they’re telling you to hold your hand while they cash out. And you? Well, you’re stuck on Hopium, hoping for the best while reality is screaming, “Fold already!” And then there’s the little nugget that you probably didn’t know: You don’t actually own your stocks. That’s right, you’re just the “beneficiary owner,” which is a fancy way of saying, “You’re holding the bag when things go south.” That pretty portfolio statement? It’s just a digital number that could vanish faster than your advisor’s excuses after the market crashes. You’re basically like someone checking their wallet for cash after they’ve been mugged—spoiler alert: it’s gone. But hey, the fun doesn’t stop there. Let’s talk about your bank. You think your money’s safe just sitting in your account? Think again. The second you deposit it, the bank’s off to the races with your cash, lending it out and leaving you with what? An IOU. That monthly statement isn’t a sign that your money’s safe and sound—it’s the bank’s way of politely telling you, “We owe you this much, but don’t hold your breath.” And if they get into trouble? Good luck getting it back anytime soon. So, before you let your financial advisor or bank serve you another round of Hopium, here’s a checklist of questions you should be asking them—because if these haven’t crossed your mind yet, you’re in for a real eye-opener. Ready?

**Checklist** Are You Asking Your Financial Advisor (and Bank) the Right Questions?

#### **Stock Market Stuff**

#### 1. **Warren Buffett is Sitting on $280 Billion in Cash—Is Your Advisor Telling You to Hold?**

- ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

Warren Buffett, the guy who’s made billions from the stock market, is sitting on $280 billion in cash right now. He’s not waiting for the next big stock rally—he’s trimming his portfolio like a hot knife through butter. But your advisor? They’re telling you to “hold on” because apparently, you should just ride this one out. Sounds like great advice… if you like living on the edge.

#### 2. **Are You Just the Beneficiary Owner of Your Stocks?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

Reality check: You don’t actually own your stocks. You’re a beneficiary owner, meaning you have zero control. That sleek portfolio you get each month? Just digital numbers that could vanish when the market crashes. The institutions hold the keys, and when things go wrong, they can lock you out of your own portfolio. #### 3. **Pay Capital Gains Taxes or Watch Your Portfolio Crash—Which Is Worse?** Your financial advisor loves saying, “Don’t sell, you’ll have to pay capital gains taxes!” Because paying taxes on profits is worse than watching your entire portfolio crash by 30%, 40%, or even 50%, right? The genius move here? Wait until the market tanks, and boom—you’ve got no gains to tax! Brilliant! You’ve lost it all, but at least no taxes were involved. - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

#### 4. **Corporate Insiders Are Dumping Stocks at Record Speed—Are You Still Holding?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** Corporate insiders—the people running the companies you’ve invested in—are dumping stocks at a record pace. But don’t worry, your advisor says to “hold and wait.” Why panic when the insiders are cashing out like it’s a fire sale? They probably know something, but hey, why should you? #### 5. **Are You Prepared for a Global Cyberattack That Could Wipe Out Digital Accounts?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** The World Economic Forum has been warning us about a massive **cyberattack** that could take down global financial systems. Hackers are already attacking portfolios and accounts on a daily basis. What if your digital money just disappears with a stroke of a keyboard? But hey, keep pretending it can’t happen. #### 6. **Did They Explain the Inverted Yield Curve and What It Means for Your Portfolio?** The yield curve has been inverted for over **750 days**—which is the longest period in history. What’s an inverted yield curve? It’s when short-term interest rates are higher than long-term rates, and it’s been a precursor to every major market crash. Let’s look at the numbers: - **2000 dot-com crash**: Market down by **50%** after the yield curve inverted. - **2008 financial crisis**: Market down by **50%** after the yield curve inverted. - **2020 pandemic crash**: Market down by **35%** after the yield curve inverted. _And now? This is the longest inversion ever, which is a flashing red light. If history repeats itself—and it usually does—this could be setting up for the worst crash in modern history. But don’t worry, your financial advisor will still tell you to “ride it out,” even as the market starts to implode. - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

#### 7. **Are They Telling You That Global De-dollarization Could Tank Your Stocks?**

- ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

The world is slowly dumping the **U.S. dollar**. As foreign governments diversify away from the dollar, this shift undermines the value of U.S. stocks and bonds. But don’t worry, they tell you the U.S. economy is strong—meanwhile, everyone else is jumping ship. #### 8. **Have They Mentioned Inflation Is Over 15%, and It’s Eroding Your Portfolio?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** The government says inflation is at 3%, but anyone buying groceries or paying bills knows it’s 15% or more. Food, energy, and insurance costs are rising, eroding your savings and investments. Inflation is a quiet thief, and it’s burning through your portfolio like a wildfire while your advisor pretends it’s a minor inconvenience. #### 9. **Massive Unemployment Is Rising—How Will It Affect Your Portfolio?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** With layoffs increasing and jobs disappearing, the domino effect is coming. People stop spending, businesses collapse, and the stock market follows suit. Has your advisor mentioned how this growing unemployment crisis will erode the market? Probably not. ### 10. **Did They Mention What Billionaires Are Doing with Gold?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** While your financial advisor is telling you to “hold tight,” billionaires like Ray Dalio, Stanley Druckenmiller, and Naguib Sawiris are taking a different approach. Dalio, with his famous line, “If you don’t own gold, you know neither history nor economics,” has allocated a significant portion of his hedge fund’s assets to physical gold. Egyptian billionaire Naguib Sawiris invested half his net worth into gold, betting on its stability during economic and political turmoil. Even Stanley Druckenmiller has moved into physical gold, concerned about global currency devaluation. These billionaires aren’t sitting on digital numbers—they’re stacking up on real, tangible wealth. So, why aren’t you?

#### **Banking Stuff**

#### 11. **Did They Tell You That When You Deposit Money, It’s Just an IOU?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** You deposit money into the bank, and you think it’s safe. In reality, they’re giving you an IOU while they go gamble it in the financial casino. It’s out of your hands the moment it hits their system, and when things go south, guess who’s at the mercy of the bank? You. #### 12. **Are You Being Told Your Bank Statement Is Just an IOU?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No** That polished bank statement you get every month? It’s basically just an IOU. Your money isn’t sitting safely in a vault—it’s out in the world being used by the bank. And if they can’t cover their bad bets, guess who loses? You. Your monthly bank statement is nothing more than a polite letter telling you how much they owe you, but the actual cash? It’s gone. #### 13. **Did They Mention That Banks Are Sitting on $1.5 Trillion in Commercial Real Estate Debt, $500 Billion in Insolvent Bonds, and Hundreds of Billions in Zombie Corporation Debt?** Banks are currently juggling $1.5 trillion in commercial real estate debt, $500 billion in insolvent bonds, and hundreds of billions in zombie corporation debt. And when those debts come due, and the banks can’t cover the losses, your deposits could be at risk. But don’t worry, they’ll still send you that nice IOU statement each month. - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

####14. **Did They Explain What Happens in a Bank Bail-In?** - ** ☐ Yes** - ** ☐ No**

In a bank bail-in, the bank can take your deposits to cover their losses when they’re in financial trouble. So, when the bank needs a quick cash infusion, guess whose money they’re coming for? Yours. They freeze accounts, hold your funds, and you’re left hoping they let you back in.

### **Conclusion: Time to Wake Up**

So, let’s get real for a second. I’ve been hearing the same thing from a lot of people lately: “My portfolio is safe and conservative,” “My financial advisor said everything’s fine,” and, of course, “There’s nothing to worry about with the banks.” You’d think everything’s sunshine and rainbows, but guess what? That sunshine? It’s about to be swallowed by a financial storm. And when the lightning hits, your portfolio is going to turn into a full-blown dumpster fire, and the only thing you’ll be roasting over it will be marshmallows—and your financial future. Meanwhile, while you’re sipping on Hopium like it’s the solution to everything, the smart money—Warren Buffett, corporate insiders, and anyone with half a clue—has already packed up. They grabbed their gold, silver, and common sense, and bailed. And you? You’re sitting there, convinced that your advisor has everything under control. Yeah, the same advisor who’s pouring you another round of Hopium while saying, “Just ride it out.” Sure, because ignoring systemic risk always works, right? Let me explain this in simple terms: systemic risk means that when the market crashes, everything crashes . Your “safe and conservative” portfolio? It’s about to be toasted right along with everything else. And while you’re sitting there with your marshmallow stick, your advisor is laughing all the way to the bank—because, newsflash, they make money no matter what happens to you. The checklist I gave you isn’t just a suggestion—it’s your reality check. It’s the part where the smart money already knows what’s coming and got out before the fire started. It’s the part where corporate insiders are dumping stocks faster than you can roast that marshmallow, and where global de-dollarization, inflation, and the inverted yield curve are all huge neon signs telling you that the storm is already here. If you’re still thinking that Hopium will save the day, I hate to break it to you—it won’t. If you don’t read the checklist and prepare, there’s nothing I, your advisor, or anyone else can do to help. You’ll be the one standing there, roasting marshmallows over your burning portfolio, wondering why you didn’t see this coming. Well, you’ve been warned.

So, what’s it going to be? Stop listening to your financial advisor, grab the checklist, and protect your wealth with privacy, preservation, and protection through physical gold and silver, or keep toasting those marshmallows until your portfolio is nothing but ashes. The storm is here, and once that lightning strikes, there’s no going back. Oh, and for those who love physical copies—I’ll even attach a PDF of the checklist so you can print it out, frame it, or tape it to the fridge as a daily reminder. You know, just in case you need a tangible lifeline when everything else starts burning. Read the checklist. Get serious. Or enjoy your roasted marshmallows while your portfolio burns. Your call.